5 steps to ditch the grind and start building a life you actually love (even during the holidays)

Hey, girl, haaaay! If you’re here, I’m guessing you’ve had those moments I’ve talked about so many times—staring out the office window, feeling trapped, and wondering, “When will all this effort actually add up to the life I really want?” Maybe you've been dreaming of ditching the daily hustle, building a life that feels like yours (not just a weekly countdown to Friday). But then there’s the big question that always looms: How do I actually make that happen?

First of all, know that it is possible to break free. And no, you don’t have to sacrifice all of your security, stability, or sanity to do it! Here’s how you can start today—not with more vague ideas, but with clear, doable steps that will bring you closer to the life you’re dreaming about! No fluff. And no pretending it’s easy, either. Just a real, actionable path to leaving the grind behind. 👇

1. Define your life of freedom

YES to all the time-, money-, career-, and lifestyle-freedom you’re dreaming about! Yes, girl, YES! And if you want to build a life you love, you’ve gotta really see what that life looks like. You’ve got to do what most people never do: go beyond the daydream and actually define what it is you want to create.

I’m not talking about a pretty Pinterest board (though, hey, pin away if that gets you excited!). I mean getting super clear on what you actually want to be doing and having—day by day—in this life of freedom. What would your daily schedule look like? How much would you be making? Who would you be helping?

Vague goals like “more money” or “more free time” just don’t cut it. Picture the specifics of your dream life: the hours you’d work, the people you’d help, the impact you’d make. Write it all down. And don’t worry if you don’t know how to get there yet. Knowing the “what” is enough for now.

How this moves the needle:
Getting clear on your vision isn’t just a feel-good exercise, it’s your foundation for making it happen. The more specific you are, the more real it feels, and the easier it becomes to make choices that align with your vision. Clarity gives you direction, and makes each step on the path feel purposeful. 

Examples:

Wanting to leave your 9-to-5?
Imagine someone whose goal is to be a freelance designer working 20 hours a week. Instead of just saying, “I want more flexibility,” she defines her ideal setup: “I work Monday through Friday, four hours a day, with steady clients and a monthly income of $XX.” With this clarity, she can start taking small steps to make it her reality.

Wanting to grow your business?
Picture someone who’s launched her business but feels like she’s still trading time for money. Instead of vaguely wanting “more freedom,” she envisions a setup where she serves a handful of steady clients, is paid per project (not per hour/session/etc.), and takes Fridays off, for self-care and to recharge. With this vision, she can focus on setting realistic goals to support it.

Time to take action:
Grab a pen and paper or your journal, and take 20 minutes to write out your ideal day. Answer questions like:

• What time do I start and end work?
• Who am I working with or helping?
• What’s the “why” behind what I’m doing?

2. Build a bridge instead of jumping off a cliff

This is where too many badass women get stuck. They think creating more freedom in their lives requires jumping off a cliff to get started. No wonder they don’t start, right? Leaving the grind doesn’t have to mean jumping off a cliff and hoping you grow wings. Think of it as a bridge you’re building, step by step, out of where you are, into where you want to be.

Most women who actually do create more freedom don’t take giant leaps, they start with small steps, because they find that approach to be more doable and less scary. (Side note: If you want to jump off the cliff, then fly, baby, fly! I’ve done it both ways, and there’s no “right” way. But know that cliff-jumping isn’t required, even if you have a 9-to-5 or a full plate.)

If you’re in a full-time job, maybe your first step is launching a side hustle. Or, if that feels like too much right now, maybe it’s starting with a weekend course or networking event. If you’re already in business, your step might be setting a weekly goal, like reaching out to three potential clients or hitting a new income target.

You don’t have to leap if that’s not your style. You can absolutely create a plan where you move forward one solid step at a time.

How this moves the needle:
When you believe you have to take a huge leap to make a change, it can feel so overwhelming that you never start. But when you set a smaller, doable target, you’re able to move toward it day by day. It’s about creating momentum without needing to jump off a cliff.

Examples:

Wanting to leave your 9-to-5?
Think of someone who dreams of becoming a coach but feels uncertain about leaving her job. Instead of quitting outright, she starts by offering a single coaching session on weekends to see if it’s truly her passion. Her goal is to fully book ONE coaching spot, while she maintains her 9-to-5. As her confidence grows in her coaching skills and ability to gain clients, she’s building a foundation for a smooth transition.

Wanting to grow your business?
Imagine someone with a small wellness business. Instead of doing a full-scale launch of a brand-new wellness program, she starts by testing a personalized nutrition coaching session with one or two clients, focusing on a tailored meal plan and weekly check-ins. She gathers their feedback, refines the offer, and tries it again with a couple more clients. This builds her confidence, provides valuable insights, and moves her closer to her bigger vision of a full-scale launch of her new signature wellness program.

Time to take action:
Identify one step you could take this month. Could you start a small freelance project? Take an online course? Join a network or community related to your goal? Create a social media account and start posting? Choose something that feels doable and go for it! Then, take the next step (or next handful of steps) next month. Repeat.

3. Build a personal brand (Yes, even before you quit!)

Let’s talk about why building a personal brand matters, even if you’re not 100% sure what business you’d want to start, or what your 9-to-5 exit strategy will be. By starting your personal brand now, you’re building connection, which gives you a huge advantage when you do decide what business you’d like to start or strategy you’d like to execute.

Whether it’s through a professional Instagram account, a blog, or LinkedIn updates, you’re creating a foundation that reflects your values and vision. Even if you don’t have a business yet, sharing your ideas, values, or experiences helps people get to know you, trust you, and want to hear more from you.

You can start building a loyal community before you even have something to sell or a specific end goal in mind. It doesn’t have to be perfect or flashy, just start showing up and sharing your insights, lessons, or parts of your journey. Don’t stress if you don’t have it all figured out yet! You don’t need to know exactly what business you’ll start or what topics you’ll talk about long-term. Pick something you’re passionate about, share from the heart, and remember: it’s more about creating connection than having a polished “brand” at this stage.

How this moves the needle:
We all have a personal brand, whether we want one or not, and how you craft your brand is key to your future success. Showing up and sharing your values lets potential clients, customers, employers, partners, or collaborators get to know you, so when you’re ready to launch, you already have an audience who already believes in you and is there to support you.

And it’s not just about building a following—starting now also gives you valuable time to get familiar with social media. You can experiment with different types of content, see what resonates, and figure out what platforms work for you. By the time you’re ready to go all-in, you’ll feel much more confident using these platforms to connect with your community.

You absolutely don’t have to craft your personal brand to succeed. But if you have any interest at all, or think it might support your future goals, start yesterday! And if not yesterday, then today.

Examples:

Wanting to leave your 9-to-5?
Think of someone who’s considering starting a business in the “parenting” space, but isn’t ready to quit her job. She begins by posting homeschooling, children’s nutrition, discipline, etc. tips on LinkedIn, building a reputation and community that will support her future transition.

Wanting to grow your business?
Imagine someone already selling handmade goods. She starts sharing her creative process on Instagram, giving followers a behind-the-scenes look. Over time, she builds a loyal following ready to buy when she launches new products and wants to expand in new directions.

Time to take action:
Pick one platform where you’ll show up regularly (Instagram, LinkedIn, a blog, etc.). Start sharing daily or weekly posts related to your values or vision. Maybe share a lesson from work, something that inspires you, or even a mini-rant about the hustle you’re leaving behind. Don’t overthink it, just connect with the humans!

4. Implement a ‘Sleep-In Day’ to recharge

If you’re maxed out or struggling to (want to) get out of bed every morning, it’s time for a recharge strategy. One of the simplest (and honestly, most life-changing!) things you can do is pick a “sleep-in” morning once/week.

Dude, I know, I get it, it sounds trite! But let me tell you—it was game-changing for me and my husband! Especially if you have young kids, you know the days can feel long, and your energy tank is on E fairly often. That’s the nature of the season of life you’re in, if you have young ones, and it’s easy to find yourself going from week to week, even month to month, running on empty.

A dedicated sleep-in day ensures you’re not constantly operating in survival mode, just getting by. It lets you reset so you’re not living in a cycle of “tired to weary.” By taking one morning each week to rest, recharge, and fully reset, you’re giving yourself the energy to tackle life fully charged.

How this moves the needle:
This is obvious, no? You know how our kids get when they’re way too tired, but go around crying, and screaming at people, “I’m not tired!” Yeah, there’s an adult version of that. 😅 A regular rest day keeps burnout at bay and helps you show up with more energy for literally everything. By making a recharge day a weekly habit, you’re actively taking control of your energy and focus, which = less stressed and more productive (and so much more, honestly).

Time to take action:
Talk with your family or partner about scheduling a weekly sleep-in day (for both of you! It’s lifegiving for everyone). I know there’s no perfect day for this—my sleep-in days are a mess during football season, and my husband’s are never ideal because of our church schedule. I get how hard it is to find an ideal time in this season of life. But that’s precisely why you NEED it, not a reason to skip over it. Pick the best morning you can and get it on your calendar. It doesn’t have to be perfect; it just has to happen. Isn’t once/month better than never?

5. Set boundaries, especially in the holiday season

The holidays can bring that “pulled in a million directions” vibe, and if you’re not careful, they’ll consume your energy faster than you can say “New Year’s resolutions.” This year, instead of letting the grind take over, take control by setting boundaries and honoring your priorities.

I know how hard this can feel, especially in this season of life (for the same reasons sleep-in days are hard). When you’ve got kids, work, extended family, and all the expectations (hello, endless holiday events!), it can feel like there’s tremendous pressure coming from every direction. But here’s the thing: this is exactly why you NEED boundaries. If you’re juggling a thousand things every day, then protecting your time isn’t just a nice idea, it’s mandatory. Boundaries give you the space to actually enjoy the season (of the year, and of life!) instead of barely scraping by.

How this moves the needle:
Boundaries aren’t just about saying “no”; they’re about saying “yes” to the life you actually want. When you take control of your time, you stop letting everyone else’s needs and expectations dictate your days. Imagine feeling present instead of frazzled during the holidays—sitting down to watch a holiday movie with your kids without a million to-dos running through your mind, or attending a family gathering because you want to, not because you felt guilted into it.

Setting boundaries creates breathing room, giving you space to focus on what you value most. It’s a small step with a big ripple effect. That’s how you create a life where you’re in control—of your energy, your schedule, and your joy.

Time to take action:
This will look different for everyone, but let’s be real—you probably already know the biggest areas where you need boundaries. You’re thinking of that person right now, aren’t you? The one who constantly pressures and guilts you to spend your precious, limited holiday free-time with family who has zero interest in your life the other 11 months of the year, or the one who loves to send “urgent” requests at 4:53 PM on Fridays.

Start by listing your top 1–3 areas where you know limits are overdue. Once you’ve got your list, draw a line, and proactively communicate it. This is the moment to channel all your #sorrynotsorry vibes; This is your LIFE and you don’t owe it to others. You may want to share it, but you’re not required, just because it’s the holidays.  

You can also:

• Make a list of your holiday priorities.
• Time-block those commitments on your calendar.
• Clearly communicate your “offline” hours to your boss, coworkers, and loved ones.

Alright, friend, here’s the deal: you don’t have to stay stuck in the grind, living for the weekend and surviving instead of thriving. The life you’re dreaming about—the one filled with freedom, purpose, and joy—it’s out there waiting for you. And guess what? You don’t have to have it all figured out right now. You just need to start.

These five steps aren’t about flipping your world upside down overnight. They’re about taking small, intentional actions that create momentum. It’s about reclaiming your time, your energy, and your focus, so you can start designing a life that works for you, not the other way around.

You deserve a life that lights you up, one where your days reflect your values and your energy goes toward what matters most. So take the first step, however small it feels, and keep showing up for yourself. Each little action adds up, and one day you’ll look around and realize—you did it. You’re living the life you once only dreamed of! 🙌

And hey, if this post gave you the nudge you needed or if you loved it, don’t forget to subscribe! There’s a signup box right below, and I’d love to send you more tools, tips, and inspiration to help you keep moving toward the life you want. You’ve got this, girl! 💪✨