How I Reclaimed My Ambition and Balance After Motherhood Swallowed Me Whole

Like all new parents, we didn’t know what to expect, but we were SO excited for our first baby to get here! He finally ARRIVED; our miracle was here! And…he wasn’t healthy.  All of a sudden we had SO many challenges we never could have expected we’d need to overcome!

There we were, neck deep in trying to figure it all out…and Nick started traveling again. I was alone, I was overwhelmed with my new level of responsibility, and I couldn’t see a way to rise to the demands of this new lifestyle.

Certainly, a sick newborn is an extra challenging season! But we face extra challenging seasons over and over and over again in life, yes? And, somehow, we’ve got to learn to do it while we’re ALSO showing up for all the other things we signed up for. The other parts of our lives that are also important, because they make us who we are.

When I was drowning in it all, I went looking for advice and everyone gave me the same message in different ways: I had to slow down and just focus on being a mom. They all told me I’d never have the balance I was dying for if I still had big career ambitions and huge personal goals.

“Life is different now,” they explained.

I listened, I did what they said, and I let go of my vision of the life I thought I was meant to live, and the impact I thought I was meant to make. I let go of all my commitments outside my home and focused solely on being a mom.

And then the balance arrived, right? Wrong. So painfully wrong!

I felt so disconnected from who I really was; an ambitus woman with big goals, BOTH inside AND outside my home. My baby brought me SO much joy, but that was only one part of my story, I thought.

BUT – I’m a good student, and I followed directions. I knew I needed “balance,” so I tried to turn down my ambition, ignore the callings on my heart, and live life “slow” enough to find balance again.     

And like with so many other things in life, I re-learned, the hard way, that you can’t just follow any old advice, even if it comes from well-intentioned people. Trying to turn off or ignore huge parts of who I am left me more out of balance than when I started!

Finally. Blessedly. After too long. I started seeking my own answers. I finally let go of what others told me to I had to believe, and started to seek my own truth. I understood right away that Balance = Wellness. But what I had to learn was that balance wasn’t a place or thing I could get, but rather, was a way of being and living. And that was only the first step!

Then I had to define what balance looked like, felt like, and meant to ME. The advice I got, however well meaning, was exactly the opposite of what I needed do. Balance, in the life I was building, included all the parts of the working mom lifestyle. Balance doesn’t have to mean doing less, I learned; balance can come from doing more, but more intentionally.   

With my new understanding of balance, I was able to start showing up as ALL of who I am. I was able to start honoring the callings on my heart, BOTH inside AND outside my home. I gave myself permission to be fully ME - a mom AND an ambitious woman, on a lifelong journey of creating impact AND balance.

And that is what I am showing up every day to share. I’m shining a light on the journey I took, so you can see way, WAY sooner than I did, and with way, WAY less frustration, guilt, and pain, that:

You’re allowed to be ALL of you! There IS a way to live the working mom lifestyle with balance. And impact. And so damn much joy!

If I had known then what I know now, I would have saved myself so many tears. So many sleepless nights. So much pain, and shame, and hurtful attacks on myself! If I had known then what I’m sharing and teaching now, adjusting to the working mom lifestyle would have been so, so different, in so many amazing ways!

I’m so glad this found YOU today! If this speaks to your heart, if this reflects your journey, if this message can help YOU show up to make YOUR impact, stick around!

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